Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Random thoughts on way to college

All right,exams coming up…what am I gonna do…cant get in even one hour every day….why is that guy blowing the horn so many times…cant he see the traffic jam???What’s his problem?Oh god,this is really crazy…the exam begins in 10 minutes and I am still in ballygunge….man,I feel so sleepy…should stop watching movies till such late night….if I am awake,I gotta study….i wonder if the internet will be up and working by the time I get back….people blocking the road….damn,it had to be today of all days…but 48 hours without electricity…these people ought to be damn angry…seems like they are….there,had to get down and now….walkie,walkie,walkie……la la….when the music stops….la la…damn it!!that song’s been playing in my head all morning….how the hell am I supposed to remember the circuits,if there are so many distractions???one missed call??must have missed it because of all the noise….rony??why would he call me???oh I almost forgot…today is man u’s match with barca…and he wants to brag…barca…that reminds me…nearly forgot…I gotta return supratim’s copy tomorrow…or he’s gonna kill me….DAMN IT!!!how’s a guy supposed to walk with all these puddles around???Bloody KMC…don’t do any work and expect to get votes….nearly twisted my ankle there…whoa!!check her out!!!too bad she’s with a boy…all the girls seem to be taken these days….hey,I could have sworn she was looking at me….man,am I cool or am I COOL??yeah yeah…keep dreaming Anish baby….no harm in dreaming….HEY!!watch it you sonova-… nearly drove into me…bloody punks…thinks their father owns the road…man my legs are starting to cramp from all the walking…..lactic acid…I read that in class 8 and still remember….man…such a sweet studious boy I used to be in those days…and now look at me…I need to study…from tomorrow definitely….and from the next sem….i will study from the beginning and…aww…who am I kidding??i know what I will do next sem….doing what I was doing this sem….an sms??who can…WHAT THE FUCK???now rony tells me that the exam has been postponed…ha ha…I walked for like 4 kms…..ha ha ….man I think I am going crazy…..ha ha….

Friday, May 22, 2009

Dont give a fuck!!

All right…here goes….my attempt at being Eminem…ha ha

Slim Shady..dont kill me…I was just trying to be “inspired”…believe me…

They say that too much of a good thing is bad,whoever they are…

Well fuck them!!what do they know??get’em out of here…

I say I’ve had enough…enough with this useless life….

Lets finish this forever…lets end this futile strife…

“But anish!what are you saying??you’re gonna commit suicide?”

Big deal…its better to end it here…than to spend the rest of the days trying to hide…

Some sonofabitch screwed me out of my livelihood

“well fuck you man!!go and show him this attitude!!

Don’t take your frustration out on others,anish,you piece of crap

You’re so lost in life that you cant find your way even with a map!!”

Ok..i’ve heard enough…I am gonna shut your mouth for good….

You smug little bastard…you think you’re cool singing “hey jude”?

Yeah well,Paul McCartney and John Lennon..they didn’t have to deal with this shit!!

Take that you gutless swine…I am gonna turn on the heat!!

See how it feels…how it hurts…when I beat the crap outta you…

You’ve given me enough problems…my turn now to give you a few…

“You think you’re a big guy now??beating down a helpless guy??

Well fuck you faggot!!!now you’ve done it!!you’ve given me a swollen eye!!

You and me…we are finished….you can wallow in your mess as long as you like…

Me….I am the heartbreak kid…rapping away with LP’s Mike….”

And that’s how he left me…my conscience…may he burn in hell…that fucking jerk….

And “they” can say what they like…it’s their nature…dogs will bark….

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Angrier Than Thou

Good morning ladies and gentlemen.I am Anish Dutta and I will be here commentator today for the anger competition.Today is Election day.clap clap clap!!What a beautiful day for getting angry!!Today all of us have the license to be as much angry as we like.

The following is the list of 10 people who have reasons to be angry or are always angry:

2.SHAH RUKH KHAN-Well,during December he watched helplessly as Aamir Khan stole his thunder (and his limelight) when Aamir’s Ghajini routed his movie Rab ne.Things have been going from bad to worse for him since then as his home production Billu Barbar failed miserably….and then his team KKR(they said they have removed Kolkata from the name…so now I think it stands for Khan Knight Riders) got crushed match after match.So the number 10 spot goes to our very own King Khan for having many reasons to get angry.

3.Christian Bale-This guy is un-fucking-believable.After fucking getting into a load of fucking trouble for fucking beating up his mom,this guy went batshit crazy (pun intended) on the fucking sets of T4 and used the fucking f-word 37 fucking times in 4 fucking minutes.Looks like this guy always finds a fucking reason to lose his cool.He is at number 4.

4.The people of West Bengal-People are either angry for the loss of the Nano,or they are angry for the fiasco in Nandigram.They are also angry at Dada losing captaincy and for KKR losing in the IPL.They are also angry because of job-cuts,power-cuts,increasing rates of hair-cuts.Or they are just angry anyways.

5.Wolverine-He was hoping compete with Batman in term’s of the movies financial success…unfortunately some scum released the movie on torrent long before it hit the screens.As a result,everyone watched it long before it hit the screens.As a result it was beaten by even “Ghosts of girlfriends past” at the box-office.So people,don’t watch the pirated copy.Do you really want this on your conscience??Do you really want a movie like “ghosts of girlfriends past” to win?

6.Politicians all over the world-Because they are the most abused,hated and maligned people in the world.They have even managed to beat lawyers.And that’s really saying something.

7.People whose lives have been affected by terrorists-Those people who haven’t been affected by terrorism won’t know what its like.I feel sorry for the terrorist if he came face to face with a guy who lost a lot because of terrorism.Sorry.I take that back.I don’t feel sorry at all.

8.English People-Despite inventing most of things,their performance in all of them is pathetic.Even their language got raped by the Americans.

9.Eminem-He is always angry as his songs demonstrate.His troubled childhood,and a troubled family life contributed to this.He married the same woman twice.And divorced her twice.Now he is dating her again.His fans don’t seem to care.They think he rocks!!!I am one of his fans.

10.Devdas-He would have been completely pissed off seeing SRK and bhansali’s “devdas”.He would come alive and kill abhay deol if he saw Dev D.

And now ladies and gentlemen.its time to announce the number one.Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand the number one is:-

1.GOD-For seeing the world he created become totally screwed up.

Saturday, May 09, 2009

Love and Ego

Well over the last few posts I have written a lot of gibberish-tried to be funny,socially aware,poetic…err quite a lot of things,but have failed miserably.So in this post I want to tell you something that is very close to my heart.

Love-I have always avoided this topic.Joked about it.Given idiotic answers while pretending they were witty.But today I want to say what I really think about love.

Love-love is something which gives you a cause for living a purpose for life-more than any war ever can.Love is something which can turn you in a second from the happiest man on the planet to its saddest being.Love can be your strength-as much as it can be your weakness.Love can make your life-or destroy it.I know all these sound corny but it’s the truth about love.It really is an amazing feeling.Only the people who have been in love can know that feeling.The most powerful thing in the world.Love can make you do things which you never knew you were capable of.Love is sweet.Love is painful.Thats what makes it so beautiful.Love is selfless.Love isn’t jealous…stop Anish stop…I am gonna start crying….

But if love is so beautiful then why does love cause so many problems??if love isn’t jealous why are there love triangles which culminate in even murders??Because there-love is overtaken by something else-EGO.It makes a person think-“What??He gets the girl and not me??I am in ways lesser than him.I am going to get her in any way I can.”Ego is jealous.Ego sinks a person to depths he didn’t know he was capable of.

Some of you will say “ok..leave the triangles.Why are there so many break-ups due to mis-understandings?”Again-the answer is EGO.And this is applicable mainly for guys.I AM NOT A FEMINIST.But I have seen in many cases-when a girl is more successful than a guy,the guy starts getting grumpy,making snide comments and becoming VERY VERY bitter-but outwardly showing how happy he is for her.The male ego then becomes stronger than love.And don’t think these cases are exceptional.These cases are the majority.A guy may be very liberal on the outside,but deep down he will always be jealous when his girl is more successful than him.Ego is jealous.Ego is selfish.

I don’t know if you have noticed this in any case but in many cases I have seen that after a girl has dumped a guy,a guy cant get over her for a long time.While a girl gets over very quickly after being dumped.This too is because of-oh no…gotcha this time-this isn’t because of ego.But this isn’t because of love either.This is because he finds it hard to get over a old habit.But finally he does.

I know that many of you might not agree with what I feel.Even many might want to beat me up or hang me upside down.But this is really what I feel.If you dont agree with me that’s your problem.Not mine.

Lastly-even though ego is negative and cause of many a fights and misunderstandings-here is a bad wish-Without those misunderstandings and fights love would become really really boring.