Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Shiney-Villain or Victim?

Okk,through the media everyone knows about the now famous Shiney Ahuja case.He sexually assaulted his maid servant,broke down during interrogation and confessed…blah blah blah…the usual 9 yards.And one of my friends(who is a bit of a-well actually a lot of a feminist at heart) feels that its very wrong that he is still alive.That he should have been dead by now.How dare they continue to let him breathe when he has done such a heinous job and ruined an innocent girl’s life?The following is my opinion on the matter.
Ever since I attained some maturity I have seen that in our country women and girls are given preference to boys.A girl’s statement holds more value than a boy’s.That’s the way it is.If a girl shouts in the middle of the road-this boy is molesting me-the boy gets a sound beating before he can even say anything.In one stroke of accusation,a person’s good reputation built up over a long period of time can be destroyed.In Shiney Ahuja’s case I would like to bring up the following points-
1.Shiney Ahuja has been testified by all his friends and family to be a nice guy..not at all like you find in the film industry.And a nice guy does not act like this.So why should Shiney?
2.If he is not a nice guy and has fooled his friends all along,it means whatever he may be,he ain’t stupid.He knows what will happen if he does this.So even if he raped her wouldn’t he want to silence her forever?
3.Another question I would like to ask is why would a man with a wife want to rape some-one??That too some-one who isn’t exactly a Katrina kaif?
4.Shiney’s family denied that he admitted to rape.
5.Suppose the maid servant consented to sex at that time…then tried to blackmail him…and when he refused…she went to the police to discredit him…isn’t it possible??
I don’t know if he is guilty or not.MIND YOU,IF HE IS,HE SHOULD BE HANDED CAPITAL PUNISHMENT.PEOPLE WHO COMMIT THESE CRIMES SHOULD BE BURNT DOWN ALIVE…BUT IF AIN’T GUILTY…HE SHOULD GET A PROPER HEARING.The laws in our country are heavily loaded in the favour of women.This needs to be amended.And people shouldn’t come to conclusions sitting so far away.That’s all I am saying.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Shut up please!!

Hello ladies and gentlemen,boys and girls,brothers and sisters,straights and gays,conservatives and liberals.This is the list of people who I think talk too much shit and need to shut up immediately.

2.Mamata Banerjee-Look,I am not interested in knowing if there is a conspiracy by the Russian and Chinese brothers of the left government here to take over west Bengal.I don’t even want to know if the left are behind each and every bad thing to ever happen in this state,ok?All I know is that I badly need to sleep.I haven’t slept well for quite some time and I am extremely fatigued.SO TURN THAT DAMN LOUDSPEAKER OFF!!!AND GET THE HELL OUT OF MY NEIGHBOURHOOD!!!

3.Ramgopal Verma-Yeah,yeah,yeah.We have heard all of your blabbering before Ramu!!You said that Aag will make us forget Sholay….yeah,well it did…but not in the way we hoped!!So here’s a piece of advice-go home,think for a while and don’t come back until something good hits you…not Aag-good…satya-good or sarkar-good…ok??

4.Paris Hilton-This girl once said London is the capital of USA.Ok..i have seen dumb…AND I have seen DUMB…but that takes the cake..

5.Kareena Kapoor-Hi Kareena!!Well you see,in case you don’t remember,Jab We Met was a looooooooooooooong time ago…so stop saying Shahid is gonna use your name for promotion of his movie-and for god’s sake…get that dumb grin off your face,I throw the remote again at the TV,and my dad is gonna kill me.

6.British Media-Okay,first you made a biiiiiiiiiiiiiig deal of your football team….then of your cricket team….Well newsflash for you guys!!!The last time you won anything worth mentioning was 1966…so why don’t you win something and then go blah blah blah???And lay off the Aussies…at least they win…

7.Baba Ramdev-Look mister,nothing personal…but if I were you,I wouldn’t come on tv and give advice…instead of healing people you are making people like me sick…and violent,for that matter.Advice for you-Open a chamber and start a practice.By the way,your physique doesn’t give a very advertisement for your methods.


9.Aamir Khan-Will the real Aamir Khan please stand up?And not the one who thinks he is an intellectual actor and comes up with crappy movies like ghajini and takes potshots of SRK all the time??aah…what the hell…both are equally bad!!

10.Himesh Reshammiya-I don’t know if I got my spelling right…and I am not too bothered to tell the truth.All I want to say is you are not half as bad a music director as you are a singer…I developed an allergy to tandoori after that song of yours….so please,stay away from the mike…and more importantly,stay out of the camera’s field…please!!!

Aaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnnnnndddddddd now-The No.1 yap-yapper who really needs to zip it-

1.Anish Dutta-This good for nothing punk really needs to shut up.Anish,mate my advice to you is remember-A dumb man has no enemies.So put a lid on it.No-one’s interested in your views ok??Spare me the grief!!

Friday, June 12, 2009

Double Act

It struck me just a couple of days ago.I was watching the French Open with a friend.Roger Federer was making history.He became the greatest ever tennis player.While the presentation was going on my friend remarked-“Poor Rafael Nadal…if he was born in another generation then maybe he would have been the best of his time.Too bad he had to battle with Federer.”This set me thinking-Is that really true??What if Nadal would have been born in another generation?But before you think this is one long boring article about tennis,let me assure you it is not.My point is the presence of double-acts(if I can take the liberty to call them so) present in all fields all throughout the world.

How is it that every time someone almost invincible appears to have become the master of the field someone dares to challenge him?Someone who could logically never match them…how is it that these people always pose a threat to the champions…and sometimes even ace them.If you look at history you will see that when Akbar seemed to have gained huge power,there was one man,whose might was nothing compared to him.He was known as Rana Pratap.And yet,despite there being such a huge difference in their powers,Rana Pratap was always a thorn in Akbar’s side.Then there was Shivaji during Aurungzeb’s reign.This time the champion was even more powerful and the challenger even less so.Yet look at what Shivaji attained.No I am not writing this coloumn to glorify our national heroes.If we consider movies,there will be always be a debate between who is the best-Al Pacino or Robert di Nero-Two of the greatest actors ever..and they had to be contemporaries???If you move to cricket you will see the same thing-Sachin Tendulkar had a Brian Lara,Alan Border had a Sunil Gavaskar.

Maybe it is how God plans it.So that no-one can have it easy.And everyone has to earn it.For without Nadal,can Federer truly be the greatest ever?Can Batman be a legend if there was no joker??These guys are intense rivals,and enemies at times-But they have to have each other.That’s what motivates them to give their best,raise the bar-higher and even higher.May these double acts continue to flourish.For without them,life would become extremely boring and predictable.