Saturday, May 09, 2009

Love and Ego

Well over the last few posts I have written a lot of gibberish-tried to be funny,socially aware,poetic…err quite a lot of things,but have failed miserably.So in this post I want to tell you something that is very close to my heart.

Love-I have always avoided this topic.Joked about it.Given idiotic answers while pretending they were witty.But today I want to say what I really think about love.

Love-love is something which gives you a cause for living a purpose for life-more than any war ever can.Love is something which can turn you in a second from the happiest man on the planet to its saddest being.Love can be your strength-as much as it can be your weakness.Love can make your life-or destroy it.I know all these sound corny but it’s the truth about love.It really is an amazing feeling.Only the people who have been in love can know that feeling.The most powerful thing in the world.Love can make you do things which you never knew you were capable of.Love is sweet.Love is painful.Thats what makes it so beautiful.Love is selfless.Love isn’t jealous…stop Anish stop…I am gonna start crying….

But if love is so beautiful then why does love cause so many problems??if love isn’t jealous why are there love triangles which culminate in even murders??Because there-love is overtaken by something else-EGO.It makes a person think-“What??He gets the girl and not me??I am in ways lesser than him.I am going to get her in any way I can.”Ego is jealous.Ego sinks a person to depths he didn’t know he was capable of.

Some of you will say “ok..leave the triangles.Why are there so many break-ups due to mis-understandings?”Again-the answer is EGO.And this is applicable mainly for guys.I AM NOT A FEMINIST.But I have seen in many cases-when a girl is more successful than a guy,the guy starts getting grumpy,making snide comments and becoming VERY VERY bitter-but outwardly showing how happy he is for her.The male ego then becomes stronger than love.And don’t think these cases are exceptional.These cases are the majority.A guy may be very liberal on the outside,but deep down he will always be jealous when his girl is more successful than him.Ego is jealous.Ego is selfish.

I don’t know if you have noticed this in any case but in many cases I have seen that after a girl has dumped a guy,a guy cant get over her for a long time.While a girl gets over very quickly after being dumped.This too is because of-oh no…gotcha this time-this isn’t because of ego.But this isn’t because of love either.This is because he finds it hard to get over a old habit.But finally he does.

I know that many of you might not agree with what I feel.Even many might want to beat me up or hang me upside down.But this is really what I feel.If you dont agree with me that’s your problem.Not mine.

Lastly-even though ego is negative and cause of many a fights and misunderstandings-here is a bad wish-Without those misunderstandings and fights love would become really really boring.



Samadrita said...

Your observations are fairly accurate.Guys find it hard to get over a girl they really liked/loved but girls are sorta more realistic(or maybe even selfish at times?)in these cases.I know this guy who has created an entire blog to fill it with his emo poems about his ex-gf.I feel sorry for him.
And this ego thing eventually crops up in any relationship(not just a love relationship) to complicate things.

Anonymous said...

not selfish...practical...

shambo said...

Finally a topic which won't get polarized...lolz. Well (like you mentioned) its a topic which is very subjective and thus depends upon an individual's perception..
Love according to me is a strong contradiction coz its then when your strength(people you love the most)becomes your weakness.... Love isn't just about loving your partner its about loving your family,friends and also yourself... Come to think of it,don't we love ourselves the most and isn't that the reason why we do what we do?? So love in no way can be called a "waste of time" coz its the basis of our life(whether as love for sports,for money,for food or for human beings)... Nothing in this world comes for free(not even human emotions). And thus with love becomes ego(as u mentioned) and often comes another fatal feeling-possessiveness leading to obsession(fatal cause it kills the relationship).. Ego is an inherent feeling(present in every human being) just as love is so no1 can completely deny its presence but one should make sure that it never overpowers the feeling of love... Obsession comes when there's a lack of security in a relationship, again which depends on how an individual deals with it....
While concluding I'd like to say that no matter how much corny it sounds but its undoubtedly love which makes the world go round....

NesQuarX said...

Firstly... Congrats on coming out of the IDC closet.

Secondly, I despise the common misuse of the word 'ego' to mean jealousy or immaturity or a complex. Anyway, it's sunk too deep into popular culture now, no chance of recovery I see.

Finally, I personally feel that the gender difference in recovery times is simply due to the difference in levels of attachment to love. To women, it's like the allure of good food and a hot bath. To men, it's like the addiction of alcohol.