Tuesday, November 02, 2010

The Truth


“What is the truth?”-Pontius Pilate trying to be a smartass.

“You want the truth?You can’t handle the truth.”-Jack Nicholson on Tom Cruise wanting to sleep with The Truth.

“I always tell the truth.Even when I lie”-Al Pacino on how he rats out everyone's secrets to Inspector The Truth.

Truth-(not to be confused with the pro-wrestler with the in-ring name R-Truth who knows just one silly rap song and sings it every time and has jobbed in more matches than anyone in the history of pro-wrestling.And all characters in this article are fictional.Including the pro-wrestler mentioned in the previous sentence.Any resemblance is purely co-incidental.Now go chew on that.)

The truth is one of the most ambigious characters in human history.It is often said to be biased towards victors and unfair towards the defeated.The Truth could also be a bad sit-com starring Gerard Butler and Jon Cryer where there is nothing to laugh about but the laughter track is still rolling on the floor laughing.But that is just digressing from  the point of the article which is to find the truth.

The truth is someone whom  everyone claims to be looking for but no-one actually likes.
Case in point-

“I am a really bad person”-to this statement the answer in 90 percent of the case should be yes TRUTHfully.But the tried and tested answer which works in this case is “No your not”.

Truth has a hot girlfriend called Lies-whom everyone likes because she’s kind of a slut and usually satisfies everyone.As is the hypocritic nature of human beings everyone claims to hate lies but everyone is in bed with her.Yet truth sticks with this cheating bitch because without Lies there won’t be the Truth.

In his young age the truth used to be a very athletic and gullible guy.All brawns no brains.That’s why he could easily be twisted and manipulated.Nowadays no one bothers with that though.Whenever there’s a job to be done everyone employs his girlfriend.

Truth used to be bosom buddies with the fictional character Yudhistira-But he wasn’t much of an adviser.When he listened to truth Yudhistira lost his kingdom,had to go live in a forrest and share his wife with his 4 bro-hams.But one day after he listened to his other pal Krishna instead of Truth-he got back everything.Since then truth is never the best friend of everyone.

Truth is usually disliked by most because he is very arrogant and brash and doesn’t care for people’s feelings.Then there’s this dude called Poetic Justice whom Truth can’t stand and hamper his work at every possible chance.

Despite all his shortcomings-everyone meets Truth once in a life face to face-and even though he is a no-good angry foul-mouthed son of a bitch-most usually feel lighter after they have met him.Which is why I guess he still lives on to this day.

And with that I conclude this article.My parents did not send me to study engineering for this.Yet this is how pathetic I have become.And that’s the TRUTH.

15 comments:

Samadrita said...

You don't write in quite some time and then come up with such a kickass post. The analogies, the terms used, the language, the way it has been expressed...everything is perfect! :-) Loved it.

Anonymous said...

Awesome !!

Anonymous said...

hey, can u pls enable subscription to ur blog posts by email. U dont write that frequently so an email notification will be much appreciated

Soumya said...

Awesum!!...I second Samadrita...the analogies were mind blowing...specially that part----
"Truth has a hot girlfriend called Lies-whom everyone likes because she’s kind of a slut and usually satisfies everyone.As is the hypocritic nature of human beings everyone claims to hate lies but everyone is in bed with her.Yet truth sticks with this cheating bitch because without Lies there won’t be the Truth."
that was really really mindblowing...and f****** true!!

Anish said...

@samadrita-thanks a lot.Your comments are always much appreciated.

Anish said...

@anonymous-thank you.I will try to do that.I jut don't know how to. :(

Anish said...

@soumya-thanks a lot mate.I be humbled.

Samadrita said...

@Anish: Use feedburner for the subscription thingie..since you've a google account you'll automatically be able to log in. Then register your blog and follow the instructions..get the HTML code for the 'subscription by email' widget and put it on your blog.

NesQuarX said...

To spin such an elegant tale, that too about an imaginary premise... Kudos.

Anish said...

@samadrita-thanks a lot.Done it. :)

@nesquarx-long time no see mate.And your opinions are always greatly valued.So thanks a ton :)

Quintessence Of Illusion said...

this one is really innovative...i loved the style,i loved the comparisons,the loved the way you have presented the whole thing...superb

Ankit said...

this post is a heck fanatbulous quirky piece of awesomeness...dats what the truth is.

Sayandeep Kundu said...

Once again stopped by your pro only to devour this freaking awesome write...

Anish said...

@QOI ankit and sayandeep-thanks a lot friends...your kind words really mean a lot to me..

BAPIN said...

\br0-hams/

SNOOGENS