Saturday, April 11, 2009

Some one-liners

Ok, firstly-these aren’t mine.I found them somewhere and am posting them for you guys.Hope you like them.If you do-its my credit for choosing them.If you don’t-the person who spent his time writing this-he is the one at fault.

1. Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
2. A day without sunshine is like… Night.
3. On the other hand, you have different fingers.
4. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
5. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
6. Remember, half the people you know are below average.
7. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
8. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
9. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese in the trap.
10. Support bacteria. They’re the only culture some people have.
11. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
12. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.
13. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.
14. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.
15. OK, so what’s the speed of dark?
16. When everything is coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane.
17. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
18. Every one has a photographic memory. Some just don’t have film.
19. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?
20. Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines
21. What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?
22. I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
23. Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
24. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering, "What the hell happened?"
25. Just remember — if the world didn’t suck, we would all fall off.
26. Light travels faster than sound. That ’s why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
27. Life isn’t like a box of chocolates . . it’s more like a jar of jalapenos. What you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.

5 comments:

Ankit said...

valo to besh..but y dis??

Unknown said...

THE diff. fingers one is awesome. Nice set of choices.
Another one of my favourite :

"People are always coming and telling me that my smoking is bothering them. They keep forgetting it's killing me."

Samadrita said...

'Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.'
Lol this one's quite funny.Actually most of them are.And witty too.
Good job finding them.

NesQuarX said...

Always a pleasure to reread these gems... pat on your back for collecting (Don't worry, I have disinfectants). I personally love one-liners too but I just end up collecting my own :P

Anonymous said...

thanks for the comments people...