Monday, September 28, 2009

Nice Guy

The following post is a really personal one.I wrote it down sometime back when I was feeling quite depressed.I was hesitating whether or not to post this,but what the hell-here goes!!!

I have to be a nice guy,who never picks a fight.
Even if I am damn pissed off,I have to keep it quiet.
Everytime I see something happening that I feel is unfair.
I have to look the other way,’cause I’m not allowed to swear.
No-I am supposed to be this gentleman,the regular decent guy;
Who,even when in a fuckin’ mess,isn’t allowed to cry.
Oops did I say the f-word,I am sorry I apologise.
Believe me,that’s a slip of tongue I don’t have any vice.
But then you wonder,if that’s so what happened with those ladies?
Those two who left me and walked away like running from dead alleys
For s________, I wouldn’t care less for she wasn’t there for me,
But donna-i thought you loved me-how could you let this be?
You never really loved me,did ya,isn’t that just a shame?
I bet after a couple of years now,you can’t recall my name
But that’s ok,I got over you a long time back
Although for that affair,I took a lot of flak.
Half my friends didn’t like what became of me,
But that’s all behind now-this is Anish version 3.3.
Now I would never write emo songs,am not a glory-hunter
But sometimes I get the feeling,I am headed for disaster.
Every friend I’ve ever had,I feel I am destined to lose
When you think about it,ain’t that enough to blow your fuse?
But me,and the people I know,we are tougher than that
Some of us has seen tragedies that make these seem flat
I just hope the bashing and cursing and the mud-slinging would stop
I accept I am nothing but an useless psycho fop
But I don’t want to take this shit from you,hell no!!
Coz this is my life ‘welcome to The Anish Show’
Maybe the night will finally pass,and dawn will come one day
Birds singing and a breeze blowing and no one calling me gay
Till that day comes,for all of us,my friends just grit your teeth
Coz I know you guys ,my brotherhood,you can take this heat.


Samadrita said...

Hey that was nice.You can make this into a rap song or something.
And Anish why'd you have to mention the 'gay' thing? :(

Guria said...

Hey, I shouldn't say how nice this is, because I understand it is very close to your heart. But really, it is brave of you to put it out. All I can say, it takes lots, lots and lots to feel and then pen it down. I still can't do that.

Soumya said...

I have never seen u depressed, in these 3 yrs..Man,U r sooo good at hiding emotions!!.Believe me, after reading this stuff I just cudnt compare its author with the anish I's really heart quenching. Such a emotionlly touchy write up from a high spirited boy lyk u is quite amazing! N to me, the hit line was: "Maybe the night will finally pass,and dawn will come one day/
Birds singing and a breeze blowing and no one calling me gay" :)

eddie said...

Coz this is my life ‘welcome to The Anish Show"
probably this is the anish we all knw.... bcoz u share everything wit us, dnno bout oders....but i knew that u like hiding ur emotions....

neways... its ur BEST write up on the blog.....

shambo said...

A bit personal yet very engaging 2 any reader irrespective of whether he/she knows you personally.. Keep it up!!!

Ankit said...

True..Different..Hitting hard..making us remember how unfair life is...
got me all senti..

Anonymous said...

@samadrita-thanx...and i wrote it down as a rap song...and the gay thing was just comic relief....

@guria-thank you for your kind isn't that tough for version 3.3...coz then it's like looking at someone else's life....

@soumya-i wasn't depressed man...maybe drunk....

Anonymous said...

@eddie-that anish show line was courtesy eminem....and thanks for the kind words....

@shambo and ankit-thank u fellas.....

adidas said...

that was indeed very touchy,although a bit non-anish type of post i assume.i agree with soumya,you had never been so depressed...
those lines("may be....dawn will come one day")reminds me of a happy ending drama,like the lines from che guevara's motorcycle diaries "Creo que he visto una luz al otro lado del ro"(there will be light on other side of the ro").

Smoke, weed, novels and maths said...

ossadharon !!!
yesss- it takes a lot of courage to actually write these things down. And Anish, hats off to u. I think this post has officially changed my opinion of u.

I know how it feels like when such a happy-go-lucky guy like u is depressed.